Just have too many thoughts about so many things that I fear I may lose some of them due to my increasingly failing memory.
1) This is one camp where I felt such a lack of grace to minister to others. Whether it be out of fear or weakness, I simply felt without strength when asked to pray for others. However, a couple of dear brothers did pray for me which was refreshing. A sister sort of "confirmed" it today when she mentioned how she often the leaders are called to pray for others, but who then prays for the leaders? Are we not men (and women) of like passions and of the same weak flesh?
2) This was a camp that defied my expectations and chastened me for my cynicism. While there are areas which are "questionable", God truly works in ways we do not see nor understand at times. Who would have thought that children of 14, 15 years could stand up and testify that God does not show Himself or work merely through "tears" and overt displays of emotions, but His Spirit works in a way that leaves a heart in no doubt of His Presence. While much work remains to be done, and the fruits of this camp still awaiting to be brought forth, one is left with much more optimism than before.
3) I had my doubts over what direction the camp would take after hearing about some stuff that happened prior to the camp, perhaps due to some "bad" experiences from before. However, this was a camp where much was made of Christ and His Cross. The exhortations and messages were simple, clear and direct (something that I truly hope to be able to do).
4) However, there was some disappointing behaviour that I observed in the service right after breaking camp. It left my heart somewhat grieved that people would still show such partiality even when they have just received grace from the One who judges all impartially. May the Lord forgive them in their immaturity.
5) There is gonna be some change in my ministry in church that has left me truly in a very emotionally hard position. While the arguments on paper might seem sound and good, one finds it incredibly harder in reality. But the Lord will take care of them, for no man is indispensable. The sermon today really spoke a lot about the situation, but Lord, it is not easy to just let go for they have become very dear to me. But because You say so, I will go wherever you have ordained for me. Let me not be found complaining, but always in everything trusting in Your Plan and the grace that You provide without measure.
To You alone belongs the glory, honour and power. Forever and ever.