I have finally come to realize, after such an unforgivably long time, the utter and total weakness of my flesh, of my own human wisdom and strength. The dawning realization and revelation that hits you like a speeding train and leaves you so totally and completely broken and in despair.
For it is one thing to declare it and acknowledge it with your mind, but it is a completely different story when it hits your heart. When the revelation tears away the darkness that shrouded the eyes of your heart and you realize how totally blind you were before.
For the Lord sustains us and everything in the Universe. No breath, no beat of our heart happens apart from the grace and power of God. In sickness and in health, in poverty and in abundance, the Lord sustains us in all situations.
Who is like the Lord? Who calls the stars by name and who commands them into place. Who raised the highest mountains and carved the deepest seas. Who commands the sea and wind to move where He so desires. And yet He calls to Man and Man says, "No!"
But yet I have greater confidence, for my confidence is in Christ and in Christ Alone. For when I am weak, He is strong. For when the Man in me decreases, then does Christ increase in me. And that is the reason why I have hope and assurance. For my God is a mighty God and I know that what He has planned for me is good.
I know that in the future, there will be times that I will try to take back the wheel. There will be times I will wander away from the path that God has set for me. I pray that the Lord will come quickly to bring me back to the narrow way.
Lord take the wheel, for I am indeed too weak to do so.