Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Sianz

I have a inorganic and history test tomorrow and I spent the entire afternoon doing BB stuff and the entire night talking about BB stuff. Haiz, I wonder whether I am really wasting my time in NUS studying something that I would most likely not be doing after I graduate.

Often times I think of the amount of time I spent in BB and I wonder why the heck do I devote so much of my life to it. Man do I need to get a life outside of BB.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Hymn of Faith

Though the fig tree may not blossom,
Nor fruit be on the vines;
Though the labor of the olive may fail,
And the fields yield no food;
Though the flock may be cut off from the fold,
And there be no herd in the stalls—
Yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will joy in the God of my salvation.

- Habakkuk 3:17-18


Sometimes I feel so far away. Sometimes I feel so alone. Sometimes I feel that the future holds nothing good for me. And yet, I will rejoice in the Lord, for He is good and His Love endures forever.

I miss the days when I felt so fired up to give bible study. Days when I justed wanted to go and give those "fire and brimstone" messages that are so needed in the church. But yet now as I look back, I realise the pride that was in my heart, that I felt I was "above" those in my cell group in church. Who am I to teach the Word of God to others?

"I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing."

- Romans 7: 18-19

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Minister Salaries to go up?

Simply astounding. While Singaporeans struggle to survive in this "globalized" economy, the Pappies can still declare that they're only being paid half of what they could get in the private sector. Utter bullshit I tell you. Greed really has no bounds in this world.

Heh maybe 12th Coy should start paying officers a "competitive salary". If not we might leave and go serve in some other youth organization that pays better.

Sunday, March 18, 2007

On nostalgia and Inspiration

To inspire: To stimulate to action; motivate

Sent a friend off to Tekong last Thursday for his two year NS stint (cuz of PTP la). As I walked through the Tekong ferry terminal, looking at my old company line and parade square, I could not help but remember all the good times in BMT (Yes I said good ;p)

I first enlisted on 18th February 2003 to BMTC school one Foxtrot Company. I remember the trepidation yet excitement to finally enter NS. (Weird I know, but all my friends were already enlisted by then so now I could finally join all of them heh.)

I remember the first PT session in Foxtrot involved our entire platoon in pumping position on the basketball court that had been heated by the noon sun. Our platoon sergeant and all the section commanders were there as well with us on the hot synthetic floor. I remember our PS leading us in doing 70 push ups and for every one that we recruits did, all the commanders would do five. When we finally recovered from pumping position, almost all of our palms were black from the heat of the floor. This pretty much set the tone of my first BMT.

For every training, whether it be a gym session or field camp, my platoon instructors were right by with us. When we put camo on, they would put camo on as well. (though with much more interesting patterns than our own three black stripes across the face heh.) During our simulated war games in field camp, our section commanders would be there beside us doing our fire-and-movement. When we went for BIC (or Battle inoculation Course for those who do not know), my section commander was with us crawling through the gravel and under barbed wire, often looking back and urging the stragglers to crawl faster. My PS issued to us a challenge at the start of BMT that if our entire platoon could do 3 times as many chin-ups as all the platoon commanders combined, they would do 100 push-ups for us. No easy feat considering that all of them could do 25 chin-ups on average and most of us were zero fighters (cannot do even 1 chin-up). Inspired by the challenge though, by the end of BMT, we had safely beaten the marker and got our 100 push-ups which they all did on the spot.

My OC in Foxtrot was a quite famous personality for those who went through BMT from end 2002 to about 2004 when he got posted to OCS as an instructor. I remember that before every route march he would come walking out of his office carrying this huge alice pack and a monkey ramp (which is used to hammer iron posts into the ground and weighs like another field pack). He would take his place at the head of the company and off we would go. Whenever we reached a rest point, the command to hold our rifles overhead would inevitably follow before we could halt. While the rest of us groaned, the OC would hold his monkey ramp ramrod straight above his head, exhorting us to push beyond our physical endurance.

At the end of the day, he made us feel like soldiers. Despite the simpleness and basic stuff that was taught, the OC never failed to impress upon us that ultimately, what we needed to break was our mindset. That even when our mind sometimes says "no more", if we did not push beyond the limits we thought we had, we would never realise our real potential. Often times we would be so "shack cannot think", but what I learned was that we often set limits that are much lower than what we can actually do.

What inspired me most was seeing our section commanders, platoon sergeant, platoon commander and OC there with us when we were training. They taught us and they taught with us. Crawling through the mud ahead of us, they led from the front, showing us how it was to be done.

Sometimes when I think about 12th Coy, I wonder then how to inspire the Boys to push beyond their limits. Sometimes I think, we trainers just need to lead from the front, teaching them as well as with them.

Friday, March 16, 2007

A God who understands me?

"For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin."

- Hebrews 4:15

Can God, creator of the heavens and the earth truly understand the pain and temptations of this earthly realm? Yet His Son, who descended to suffer the torment and pain of the flesh, managed to emerge from it unblemished. Not only that, but having gone through the temptation of the flesh, can now sympathize with our plight!

"Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need."

- Hebrews 4:16

Oh God have mercy on me.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

I hate Mondays

Ever felt so tired that you just could not be bothered to do anything but stay at home and stone? Got up today feeling like there was a stone in my head. Couldn't think straight at all, but still had to go for lectures especially organic since that is one module which I am totally lost at.

2 tests coming up as well as loads of readings that I just never got round to doing for my history and political science module. I had to literally drag myself to lecture in the morning.

And to think that exams are seven weeks away.

Monday, February 26, 2007

Becoming Blogger-savvy

Yay, I just figured out how to add music to my blog. Expect more Gospel goodness in the coming weeks. ;p

Saturday, February 24, 2007

What does the future hold?

When I look back at the road I've traveled, when I think of the road ahead, where will it all lead?

10 years ago I was a little Sec 1 just entering ACS (I) and staying in Hall 2 of the ACS Boarding School. 10 years ago I entered ACS alone, not knowing anyone, unsure of the trials and challenges ahead. 10 years ago I joined the Boys' Brigade 12th (I) Company as a continuation from my years as a Junior from 42ndJ Coy (Nanyang Primary).

How time flies and soon 10 years are gone. So much has happened in that decade, most of what I can remember being from the BB. The ecstasy of Live Praise in Sec 2, the agony of LTC II in Sec 3, the euphoria of TA Camp in Sec 4, the 2 naive years in ACJC. That unforgettable ministry in ACS Boarding School, that eye-opening trip to India, the depression of doing 2 BMTs, the joy of entering OCS and the fun memories of NS in TAB. Studying in NUS a subject that I question my passion for and through it all, an officership in the 12th.

When I look back at the road traveled, I think of the life changing decisions made and the events that occurred. The time I nearly joined Scouts instead of BB in Primary School, the six years I spent as a Boy in the 12th, being posted to WSO (C3) especially since my physical fitness really cannot make it ;p. How can I deny that evidence of a higher Power directing my paths.

For though I constantly sin and fail, He remains faithful and forgiving. Even when I feel depressed and lonely, He stays by my side. Even when I feel He is so far away, I look back and see that He guides my paths and is patient with me.

When I think of the road ahead, life seemed so much simpler and straightforward 10 years ago. Enter ACS (I), get 8 points in O levels, apply for ACJC, get a few As in the A Levels, go NS and finally study in NUS. Now I find myself questioning "what now?". I shudder to think of the uncertain future. Future relationships and work, future commitments and disappointments, future heart ache and sorrow.

Where will the road of life lead? Before its inevitable end, what will transpire in the life ahead? When will it end? Tomorrow? Next year? 10? 20? 60 years? Oh that I may have more faith in His goodness and Love. What a wretched man I am, not worthy of his Love or even a glance from Him. How can He forgive me for all the times I've sinned and gone against His Word. Oh to break out of this wretched state that I am in. Lord have mercy on me.

"He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance."
- 2 Peter 3:9

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Testriffic.com


heh dunno whether above is true or not ;p

Friday, December 01, 2006

Thought for the Day

If Man did not die, would he still have a reason to live?

"Now all has been heard: here is the conclusion of the matter:
Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.
For God will bring every deed into judgement, including every hidden thing, whether good or evil." - Eccl 12:13-14

Friday, October 27, 2006

At last an update

Finally another update after 2 months. Heh, I think my blog can become bi-monthly liao. Lots of stuff to do both in ACS and in NUS and I'm frankly quite sick of studying in NUS.

If you've read the newspapers in recent weeks, you would have known that there is a huge uproar over the "Wee" incident. Her remarks coming so soon after a poor Singaporean had thrown himself into the path of an MRT train is like lighting a bonfire on a tank of explosives.

However, her remarks have got me thinking about the roles of those of the more fortunate. It is indeed heartwarming to see the public outpouring of donations to the family of the late Mr. Tan. I believe that those who have plenty should share it with those who have little. What use is the money that you hoard up during your life after you're dead.

Do not despise or look down on those poorer or less fortunate than you for you never know, you may end up like them in the future.

"Naked I came from my mother's womb and naked shall I return there. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord." - Job 1:21

"

Friday, August 04, 2006

Back Again // And School's Starting Again!

Time to dust off the old blog and do some updating. ;p

Finally after close to 4 months of slacking it's time to prepare for a new school year and bid for modules. Oh and did I mention I absolutely detest bidding?
I basically forgot that the bidding round ends at 1700H rather than 2100H, so when I got back, I did not get any of the modules I wanted. To make matters worst, there were no more free slots at all. Now I've gotta wait till next Monday to find out if they will have more slots to bid for. Sigh....

Australia is such a beautiful country, with the wide open spaces and excellant weather, not to mention the huge variety of food available. Staying with my brother for 18 days, we basically spent most of the time eating if we weren't shopping or sleeping. ;p Who knows, maybe I'll spend my post-grad studies in Melbourne.

I've realised how much time I spend surfing the net and all the various blogs and internet forums. Ever since the GE, the internet represents a wonderful medium where people can meet and share ideas easily. My faith in the ST's credibilty has pretty much evaporated since the GE. And everyday the home news remains biased and tainted by Pro-PAP propaganda.

In the run-up to National Day, or rather "PAP Day", I can frankly say that the only things keeping me on this chunk of Earth are my family and relatives. Despite all the hoo-ha about "Singapore's struggle for Independence", the sad truth remains that we've basically traded one set of imperial rulers (the British) for another set of rulers, one that hides under a facade of democracy while practising a form of autocratic rule only seen in countries like Myanmar and North Korea. For what price are Singaporeans willing to countinue to pay in the name of economic progress. In the end, who actually benefits from the blood and sweat of the common man.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Finally the truth is out

http://www.yawningbread.org/arch_2006/yax-615.htm


GRCs were skewed from the start and Singaporeans have been hood-winked for 20 years about supposed minority representation. Yet 66.6% of Singaporeans still believe the hogwash that Singapore is governed by a democratic "1st-World government". I'm amazed that they can recite the pledge without batting an eyelid.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

The Lie of Tithing?

Found this link on the "lie of tithing".

http://home.hetnet.nl/~antoonwierda/SERMONS/thelieofthetithe.htm

This is a more detailed discussion on tithing than an earlier one that I found. It's a pretty long read, so prepare to have sore eyes after reading it.

Conclusion: Is tithing appropiate in the 21st Century? In Singapore, we see pastors of some churches (no names lol) living the high life in expensive homes and wearing thousand dollar suits. Are we driven by the "Law" to tithe 10% of our income or allowance, or do we give freely and cheerfully whatever we want to give. What is the point of tithing? To pay Church expenses? (Including the pastor's salary as well as the numerous church staff), or rather to support the homeless and hungry? If you had $100, would you give it to the church as part of your "duty" to tithe, or would you rather give it to a brother (or sister ;p) you know that has financial diffculties?

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Worker's Party Open House

Went to the Worker's Party Open House on Monday with a NUS friend of mine. We met up at Lavender MRT at around 7+ and proceeded to have dinner at a coffee shop nearby. We didn't intend to go to the Open House so early (it started at 8pm), thinking that there would only be a small gathering of people. Boy were we wrong though.

The Worker's Party HQ consists of a 2nd Storey office of a small shop office. A far cry from the big and impressive buildings that the ruling party spend there time in ruling over Singapore. In fact, there was another office (for a ShippingCompany I believe) that shared the same floor as the WP office. The WP office area consisted of a large conference room (large being relative here) and a smaller meeting room. By the time I reached there at about 8.30pm, the place was packed! There were no more seats and my friend and I eneded up standing at the side of the room. All together I estimated about 60 people, not including the WP members there themselves.

The first half of the Open House consisted of some informal speeches by WP members like Perry Tong, Goh Meng Seng and few others I don't recognise. Nothing too deep or 'cheem', just some comments on the recently conducted GE as well as some introduction on the work of the WP. About 15 minutes after I arrived, Sylvia Lim was ushered to the front and she was warmly received by those present. She answered some questions on her team's performance in Aljunied as well as making some remarks about the Gomez Saga. (Won't post here lah, skarli she kena sue then how?)

The loudest applause was undoubtly reserved for Mr Low Thia Khiang when he entered the room. He came much later closer to nine and my friend commented maybe it was because the turnout was so large, that they had to "activate" LTK to come down and 'show face'. He encouraged people to sign on as WP members and to remain active in order to serve Singaporeans in grassroot activities, etc.... Seeing all these WP 'bigshots' up close was quite exciting for me. Heck, I think this is the closest I've ever been to a MP. (Actually, I once ushered Teo Chee Hean and Cedric Foo during my NS days, but this was different since LTK was actually talking to us on a personal level. ;p)

After all the talks, we promptly split up into smaller groups with each WP member talking with a few members of the public. I ended up listening to Chia Ti Lik recounting his experiences with helping the WP sell their newsletter as well as his work during the GE. All in all, it was an eye-opening experience. These people were educated and possessed a certain personal touch that allowed them to speak the language of the common man, quite different from the alleged 'riff-raff' and 'troublemakers' that the PAP countinually spout through their faithful Party Newspaper, The Straits Times.

One can't help but admire the courage that these people take to participate in the GE. Few people acknowledge the sacrifices and pitfalls that these men and women face the moment they put their name down as a candidate. Maybe many years down the road, Singaporeans will remember those who so courageously decided to stand up for what they believed in and accord them the respect they deserve.

Monday, May 08, 2006

A wake-up call to all Singaporeans












First they came for JBJ and you didn't speak up.
Then they came for Tang Liang Hong and you didn't speak up.
Then they came for Dr Chee and you didn't speak up.
Next they came for Gomez and still you didn't speak up.
Then they come for you but by then there is no one left to speak up.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

A Pessimistic Fatalist

Yup, that's what I think I am.

"Whatever can go wrong will go wrong, and there's nothing you can do about it."

So many tests and essays and projects to go and I've completely flunked or done horribly bad for almost all of them. I just seem to get so easily distracted by things other than studying. I can't wait for this nightmare semester to end.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Gearing up for Elections

Had a very interesting "discussion" with several people about politics in Singapore. Ok ok maybe it's a bit of a "taboo" topic but who cares? ;p

Someone asked me "Why are you so anti-govt one." Heh, maybe it's in my family blood. Damn pissed that no alternative party ( alternative, not opposition ;p) wants to contest in West Coast GRC. Why must they all cluster over in the East? We in the West also need to be "liberated" ya know. Maybe I should join one like SDA so that they'll come over to the west and contest.

Sunday, March 12, 2006


Listening to a history lecture Posted by Picasa

Who said history can't be felt. ;p
Went on a field trip around Singapore yesterday looking at all the remnants of Singapore's British military defenses. My history prof really knows how to make history interesting.